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Writing your Wedding vows
When it comes to writing your wedding vows, it might be difficult to get past the "writers block" that hits so many of us. There can be a huge amount of pressure on the spouse-to-be's shoulders when thinking about what to write in a wedding vow. As a point of clarification, an example of a more "traditional" wedding vow would be: I, (Bride/Groom), take you (Groom/Bride), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part. I, (name), take you, (name), to be my [opt: lawfully wedded] (husband/wife), my constant friend, my faithful partner and my love from this day forward. In the presence of God, our family and friends, I offer you my solemn vow to be your faithful partner in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as in sorrow. I promise to love you unconditionally, to support you in your goals, to honor and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, and to cherish you for as long as we both shall live. I (name), take you (name) to be my (husband/wife), my partner in life and my one true love. I will cherish our union and love you more each day than I did the day before. I will trust you and respect you, laugh with you and cry with you, loving you faithfully through good times and bad, regardless of the obstacles we may face together. I give you my hand, my heart, and my love, from this day forward for as long as we both shall live. Typically these vows would be spoken as you faced one another during the wedding ceremony. Everyone of your guests would be watching you two say these things to one another and typically the pastor/preacher/officiant would be assisting you in saying the vows. Now do you see where the pressure comes from? So, you have a choice before you as a spouse-to-be: Do you use the typical wedding vows that couples have used for years in the past or do you write your own, unique vows? Believe it or not, more couples these days are writing their own vows. Writing your own vows is a way in which you get to celebrate the uniqueness of your wedding, your future sopuse and yourself! These are some of the reasons why couples choose to do this. So where do you start? What types of things should you include or not include? How long should it be? Here are some suggestions for you as you consider how to write your wedding vows: Be unique
Be individual. This is probably the most important step. Think about it from the perspective of thsoe who are watching you- would they want to hear you recite a vow that was found online or that was more generic in nature? Chances are, they'd like to hear something unique. They probably know at least one or both of you, so try writing something that is heart-felt and speaks about experiences you've had together, memories you cherish or what makes your future spouse unique. Make it heartfelt
Yes, you are going to be nervous. Yes everyone is going to be watching you. Yes, you'll probably even have a microphone near you. BUT, you need to come to terms with this and make your vows heartfelt! Try not to be monotonous when reading them...switch it up a little and enunciate your words and phrases! Make it a goal to make your future spouse cry!
And I mean that in a good way! Make your created vows bring tears to her eyes as you write about how you cherish the way she cooks dinners on Thursdays. Make your unique vows bring tears to his eyes as you tell him he is the only one for you and you look forward to pleasuring him. Be creative, be unique, be sincere- these things will cause your partner's heart to move. Hopefully, if you do decide to write your own wedding vows you will find some of these suggestions helpful. Remember, although there might be a lot of pressure to make it "perfect," writing from your heart is the best thing you can do to make your vows touching. |
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This intel was contributed by Pete Brown
Pete Brown
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May, 2012
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